What you were now helplessly caught in. It’s funny how a little piece of paper can tie you to someone so wholly. A tiny document that named you MRS. Collier. Which I honestly could have dealt with. Except for the fact that you were all wrong for each other.
You continued to swear that he was the one though. So instead of shooting you down completely we all said “maybe”. The kind of maybes parents tell their children to keep from crushing their hopes completely. That’s all you had to hang on to after all. And while you were clutching onto it so desperately, you forgot about us.
The people that loved you so entirely. Every disgusting, ungrateful inch of you. We loved it. But instead of stopping by to take us out (like you promised), or even to just sit around, you were with him. That’s what I get for getting my hopes up though, right? They say the higher you climb the harder you fall, and I just happened to be sky high with elation that my big sis was coming to pick me up. So I broke down completely.
Tears. Snot. Saliva. All coming at once. Could you blame me though? I felt betrayed. Hurt. Lied to. Tried to cover it up with half smiles and fake laughs. And then it all came.
It seemed like a lifetime of pain had been saving itself for this moment. Poor mother and sister subjected to looking at my ugly (and quite entertaining) crying face. Not just crying though. Sobbing and heaving. And because tears are as contagious as the flu they caught it too.
I wish you would have been there. To see how devastated I was. To see that this time you really out did yourself. Because this wasn't just a missed concert or a forgotten birthday card. This was an event. Something permanent. That couldn't just be brushed off. Something that actually mattered to me because it mattered to you.
Sure I forgave you. But we all know that forgiving isn't the same thing as forgetting and kisses and hugs and sorries don't fix all sorrows. We can never be the same. Because you hurt my feelings. And unluckily for you, there's no band-aid in the world for that.
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